I feel like I could write a novel about this...but I have been trying to get Sloane to have a play date with Davis for about the last three months while also trying not to come off as a weird stalker. It's been a real delicate balance of persistence and trying to present a laid back vibe. And here's the thing- I've practically given myself an ulcer over the damn thing because Davis is just so sweet about her. He adores her. He talks about her all the time and says things like "I wonder what Sloane is up to..." or if I tease him about doing something gross he says "I better stop that- Sloane would NOT like that..." So while I've been all cool about it, I've secretly been like "HAVE A DAMN PLAY DATE WITH MY SON ALREADY..."
So about a month ago, I decided to put my ego aside and ask her mom AGAIN if she could come over to play. Now let me be clear- her mom has always been super friendly...but I just get the vibe that it isn't as much of a priority for them as it is for us. And let's be even more clear- I get that vibe because there is NO WAY it's as important to anyone as it is to Davis. So it's not as though she has been rude- that would actually be easier. I would just take the hint, break the news to Davis and move on. But really it's just been sort of friendly, open-ended email threads, that never result in the play date we are after.
So this time- I tee it up. I wait. I get the sort of "yes, this sounds fun, what day works?" email. I send back a variety of dates to be as accommodating as possible. I wait. I get pushed from the mom to the dad (Because she was out of town this weekend) and then I don't hear from the dad. Even though the mom has committed. So of course I have already told Davis- and then midnight rolls around Friday night and I start to feel ill because I haven't gotten confirmation from the dad that Saturday morning at 9:30 will work.
The next day, I check my email at 10:00 and see that he emailed me at 4:56 am saying that 9:30 works. SO NOW I HAVE MISSED THE WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY AND I ALMOST DIE. But instead of dying, I say "How about 4:00 today, I will come pick her up and bring her back to you..." AND THANK GOD, he writes back and says "great" and gives me his cell number so now I have a quicker more direct line to this family. (okay- i realize that maybe i did venture into stalker territory over this...but it's my baby boy...)
So, we talk about it all day, and Davis INSISTS that he needs to get her flowers (in addition to the chocolates and the card) and I say "Davis- that might be a little bit much..." and he looks at me with his teeth clenched, white knuckling the pink tulips, and says "BUT SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND..." So we get the flowers. There is no arguing with this.
And then the time finally comes and we pick her up and he is very excited, but he plays it cool. And the rest of the afternoon, I was a hovering mom, not because I was worried about anything, but because I could NOT miss a moment of their interaction. It was FASCINATING.
First things first- Sloane is really adorable. And her mom owns a yoga studio and she is really edgy and hip and so Sloane is this way too. In the car ride to our house we were asking her how she has been and what she has been up to, and she casually (and coolly) says:
"You know, I'm not really into girl stuff that much. I just like to snowboard."
And then she starts talking about her school and her new friends, and how her birthday is coming up and during this talk I realize that she has a cute little speech issue- she can't say her "r's" very well. I never noticed it before and I don't think Davis did either, or it has become more of an issue because he is continually saying "What?" after everything she says...
And so I am sweating because he is so sincerely trying to hear her and she clearly has a speech impediment and I am getting nervous about this whole exchange so I keep interjecting new questions or things to talk about until we get to this one...
"Well, you know, I'm five and three nickels now..." she pauses and looks quizzical and says to me "Is that what it is? Five and three nickels, or..." and I immediately know what she means and I try not to giggle and I say "Oh, five and three quarters?" And she says "Yes, I'm five and three quarters now and I'm about to have a birthday party. MY BOWFDAY is MAWCH NINF."
And Davis says "WHAT?"
And she repeats "My BOWFDAY is MAWCH NINF..."
And he says "What?"
And then without skipping a beat, she looks at him, taps her lips and says "Look at my lips, Davis, my BOWFDAY IS MAWCH NINF..."
And I almost die inside because she has such moxie that she doesn't even notice what is going on and Davis is so mesmerized by her that he just smiles and moves on, probably never knowing what it was that she said.
So we get to the house, and she has brought a bag of snow gear over. And this is where you realize that kids pick up on social and gender norms and start to implement them whether you teach them or not...She is getting out of the car, and she looks back at Davis and says "Davis- could you carry my bag?"
And of course- little D just grabs her big bag and schleps it into the house- a thing he would only do for me upon the threat of his life.
So they get inside to my dirty, boxed up house, and she looks around and looks at me and says "Well. Your house is just beautiful..."
The hours go on and they play and play and Davis goes to give her the chocolates. And I am nervous about what her reaction will be, but she opens the box and says "Chocolates?! My favorite..." and digs in.
Then later, Davis says "I got you these flowers- they're pink." Right after she had been explaining how she likes every color but pink, and still she looks at him and says "For me? Did you know this is my favorite flower?"
And then it's time to go and I feel awkward being like "Don't forget your flowers" so I plan to just let them sit there, worrying her parents would feel Davis is coming on a bit strong...but right before we go out the door she says "OH! My flowers!" and she goes back and gets them and carries them in her lap the whole way home like a trophy.
As we are getting in the car, she says to me "Do you know what a crush is?" I grin and say "Yes, I do. It means someone thinks you are pretty great- why do you ask?" And she says "I just wondered..."
So I feel like it's time to discover her true feelings and I say "Well, I think Davis has a crush on you...what do you think about that?" She grins, he grins, and then I say "Do you think you are going to be his Valentine?" She pauses and Davis is just waiting with bated breath...and she says "Yes, I think so. I will be your Valentine."
The whole day was just amazing. Not just because he was so happy but because it was the most fascinating and endearing thing to watch. Oh, he will be such a good partner to someone some day. His kindness, and even hers, made my heart swell.
Here's Holden, killing his game. She did not like all the attention Sloane was getting...another fascinating thing to watch...Holden's disdain for not being the queen bee, even with her brother.
And then I have to end the story with this- I got a note from her mom today thanking us for having her over and she said "Sloane can't stop talking about Davis. She said they both have crushes on each other- is that the cutest thing you've ever heard?" Looks like he might get invited to her BOWFDAY party on MAWCH NINF. SO CUTE, both of them.